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Van Helsing?


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#1 Fallingtower

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 12:15 PM

Is it me or is this movie going to suck?


Also- Have you had enough of Hugh Jackman yet? I hear he is going to be the next Bond.
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#2 Ringo

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 12:49 PM

I don't expect a lot from a film which features a large green blob called 'Frankenstein'.

I'm sure all you horror afficionados can tell me why this is wrong. :wink:

And I don't think Jackman will be the next Bond as he is not British, not to mention the fact that he's neither good-looking, charming, suave or anything remotely James Bond-like.

He's all right as Wolverine though.

#3 Nick_B

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 01:01 PM

Is it me or is this movie going to suck?


This movie is going to be the suckest-uppest, and won't even be a patch on The monster Squad.

And I don't think Jackman will be the next Bond as he is not British


Neither was George Lazonby. And these are the c**ts who were seriously considering Bruce Willis for the role at one point, remember. From what I hear though, Clive Owen is the Brocollis first choice for the new Bond, but he's holding out for more money.

#4 Spinning_Grave

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 01:36 PM

Wow. Good to see other sane folk who realize this film is a pile of ass. This is exactly the kind of film making that I was trying to take a comic poke at with my own film. I really hate these post-Matrix movies. I hate The Matrix too.

#5 Ringo

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 03:54 PM

And I don't think Jackman will be the next Bond as he is not British


Neither was George Lazonby. And these are the c**ts who were seriously considering Bruce Willis for the role at one point, remember.

Ah, but he doesn't count. :wink:

I've also heard suggestions of Samuel L. Jackson (controversial but could breathe a bit of new life into the franchise) and Jonny Depp (who would be expected to stagger constantly, I'd imagine).

I hate The Matrix too.

As do I. Even at the time I thought the fight scenes were nothing special, and most of the people I knew who thought they were brilliant had never seen something like Hard Boiled.

#6 FunGuyfromYuggoth

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 04:58 PM

I've also heard suggestions of Samuel L. Jackson (controversial but could breathe a bit of new life into the franchise) and Jonny Depp (who would be expected to stagger constantly, I'd imagine).


I just a read an interview with Quentin Tarantino in the L.A. Weekly. He and Pierce Brosnan want to do "Casino Royale" (not a comedy but the original story) with 1/2 the budget of a Bond film, as a "back to basics," a farewell to Pierce, and re-boot of the series for the next actor (whomever that will be). No word yet on the producer who owns the franchise. I haven't seen a Bond film in years, but I'd see that one.

#7 TheKingInYellow

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 09:03 PM

I think it looks like it could have some charm. It's obviously supposed to capitalize on Matrix style with a gothic theme to a big audience... Much like the abhorrent crime against God that was "Underworld", the inhumanly wretched movie whose attrocity is of Holocaust proportions. My God I hate that movie with all the passion of my dead soul! The horror! The hideous, Godless horror of being!!!
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#8 FunGuyfromYuggoth

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 10:20 PM

I think it looks like it could have some charm. It's obviously supposed to capitalize on Matrix style with a gothic theme to a big audience... Much like the abhorrent crime against God that was "Underworld", the inhumanly wretched movie whose attrocity is of Holocaust proportions. My God I hate that movie with all the passion of my dead soul! The horror! The hideous, Godless horror of being!!!


I'm glad somebody else feels this way. I've actually met people who liked it. The movie had a cool look, but it was, no pun intended, soulless.

#9 Willowhugger

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Posted 02 May 2004 - 10:40 PM

It was about werewolves vs. vampires and a weird romance plot. No offense, but people who can't get enough of Gothic monsters will enjoy anything.

Van Helsing on the other hand looks to be what it is and what I will enjoy on its level.

It is a live action anime. Specifically it is a Live Action Vampire Hunter D. SERIOUSLY, from what I've read of the plot. Just replace "Van Helsing" with D and the movie is IDENTICAL to it (maybe a few less far future elements)

Kill vampires, kill werewolves, find gypsy girl, kill Dracula, brood

#10 TheKingInYellow

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 12:02 AM

I doubt the movie will have much more to it than action and atmosphere, but at least it can hopefully do it well, unlike "Underworld". To make things worse, "Underworld" is getting a sequel. So, clearly, if there's a God, he does no believe in justice.
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#11 Willowhugger

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 12:06 AM

Cthulhu says

"Underworld encourages British period actresses in leather. That's enough for me...oh yes and crossbreeding badly made costume creatures"

#12 FunGuyfromYuggoth

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 12:39 AM

Cthulhu says

"Underworld encourages British period actresses in leather. That's enough for me...oh yes and crossbreeding badly made costume creatures"


Man, you're really into crossbreeding! :lol:

#13 Willowhugger

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 01:06 AM

Cthulhu says

"Cthulhu likes anime too."

#14 Fallingtower

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 06:25 AM

I saw that Universal is using Van Helsing as a product tie in to re-release Frankentstein, Dracula and the Wolf Man on DVD.

That's one good thing that Van Helsing's (http://www.vanhelsing.net/) release has brought us. There is also a TV show in the works.

So break out your latex and black leather kiddies...time to get Gawth-ic.


-The Dracula disk includes the original Spanish version of Dracula (1931), Dracula’s Daughter (1936), Son of Dracula (1943) and House of Dracula (1945)

-The Wolfman includes Werewolf of London (1935), Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943) and She-Wolf of London (1946)

-Frankenstein includes Bride of Frankenstein (1935), Son of Frankenstein (1939), Ghost of Frankenstein (1942) and House of Frankenstein (1944)

All the disks have Van Helsing's director Stephan Sommers commentary and tresspassing all over them though :cry: .

Who did this guy blow?
"The die is cast"
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#15 Fallingtower

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 06:37 AM

By Yog's gaping maw!!

Look at the moy-chin-dyzing!
http://www.vanhelsin...viemerchandise/

Who wants to play with the 1/2 naked Helsing doll?

That way you can pretend to make Van Helsing make out with the wolfman in the back of his kickass Van Helsing Monster Truck 8O

How come no female action figs?
"The die is cast"
- Julius Caesar (ultimate power gamer)

“Almost nobody dances sober, unless they happen to be insane.”
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#16 EzekialLockhart

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 11:08 AM

Time for Van Helsing to be defended and I shall take the torch. Crappy CG effects aside, I think the plot behind Van Helsing shows promise. Dracula wants to have children with his 3 wives, I think its 3 anyways, and he hears about how Victor von Frankenstein has supposedly created life, so Dracula moves in for a hostile take-over. The Wolf-Man is just Kate Beckinsale's brother, so f**k that ****ty character.

Now while I usually hate franchises..Van Helsing is going to be one for certain. In this case I'm as giddy as a school boy. There's nothing I want to see more than Wolverine whooping the **** out of abominations to the horror genre. That's right I said it. To hell with Boris Karloff, Lon Chaney Jr. and Sr., and Bela Lugosi. They can all burn in the deepest darkest part of hell!

And whoever blasted Frankenstein early in this thread, well at least he isn't some two bit actor grunting and moaning.

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#17 Fallingtower

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 11:31 AM

Zeek Yikes!

Let me get this straight...you are poo pooing Boris Karloff, Bela Legosi and Lon Chaney in favor of Stephan (The Mummies/Scorpian King) Sommers?

I am a huge Karloff fan and love his movies.

Have you ever seen The Black Cat, The Invisible Ray or The Devil Commands?

If you had you probably wouldn't have crapped on Boris.

I can't begrudge you for your life choices though. More power to ya.

:!: I actually knew (of) a fellow who preferred the 'Dungeons & Dragons' Movie to the first of 'The Lord of the Rings' trilogy. :?

I don't think that Van Helsing is going to be talked about for the next 50 years like The Wolfman, Dracula and Frankenstein...but I've been known to be wrong.
"The die is cast"
- Julius Caesar (ultimate power gamer)

“Almost nobody dances sober, unless they happen to be insane.”
HPL

#18 OddJack

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 11:45 AM

I have to agree. No one puts bad words out about Karloff. Black Cat is an amzing gorror film, as well as the Mummy (original). The man had a style and charm that was utterly unique and wonderful. Frankenstein anbd the Bride break from the book. But they are a testament to the Whales and Karloff.
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#19 Tittan

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 11:49 AM

About Van Helsing. In my hometown, Trondheim, Norway, they're showing the movie outdoors and free at ten pm on the fifth of May on the town square...

This is just to make people want to see the movie... :roll: Off course we want to watch it, it's free innit? And we can bring beer! And laugh about the weirdness of it all :twisted:

#20 Ringo

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Posted 03 May 2004 - 11:55 AM

And whoever blasted Frankenstein early in this thread, well at least he isn't some two bit actor grunting and moaning.

True, but my point was that Frankenstein was the name of the mad scientist who created 'The Monster'. It's a common misconception that the monster was called Frankenstein, and this film is helping to spread this message.

Get yer torches, people, thar'll be a witch-hunt tonight!